


Sanctuary

by YumeArashi



Category: Raven Cycle - Maggie Stiefvater
Genre: Gen, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, abuse survivor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-29
Updated: 2019-11-29
Packaged: 2021-02-26 07:14:36
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 952
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21599767
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/YumeArashi/pseuds/YumeArashi
Summary: After his father's visit to Saint Agnes, Adam needs to feel safe.
Comments: 8
Kudos: 38





	Sanctuary

**Author's Note:**

> Spoilers through Blue Lily, Lily Blue

When Adam closed his eyes, Cabeswater was waiting.

He allowed it to comfort his sorrow, breathing its scent and listening to its sounds, watching the gentle sway of trees in soft breeze and golden sunlight. But it wasn't enough, not like this. His mind was there but his body was not, his body was still in Saint Agnes and his father had been there and it wasn't safe, it wasn't safe. He suddenly wanted Ronan - childishly, desperately, craving safety in the last person anyone would consider safe. But blood and anger and an ugly plan had put more distance between them than mere miles ever could.

Opening his eyes, he left his violated sanctuary.

He didn't know how he'd ever sleep there again.

* * *

Ronan wasn't unduly concerned not to find Adam at Cabeswater. He wasn't at Saint Agnes, so Cabeswater was the logical second choice, but there were plenty of other places Adam Parrish might be. It didn't occur to him that Adam might not want to be found.

Ronan headed back to town and checked Monmouth - no luck. Gansey hadn't heard from Adam and Noah didn't know where he might be (or if he did, he wasn't saying. It was hard to tell with Noah, sometimes). There were no classes and as far as Ronan knew Adam didn't have a shift at any of his jobs, but he checked Aglionby anyway, and each of Adam's employers in turn, annoyed anger shifting towards worried anger with each failure. He even headed out to the trailer park just in case. Luckily for Ronan's much-abused knuckles Adam's father wasn't there, but Adam's mother told Ronan she hadn't seen her son since he'd stopped living at home.

'At home' - what a joke. Ronan got back in his car with an extra-vicious slam and covered the trailer in a rooster tail of dirt as he raced away from there. He headed along Henrietta's roads without a clear destination in mind, and wasn't surprised to find himself heading unconsciously back to Cabeswater. Adam had to be there. Ronan hadn't found him, but that meant nothing. The only question was, was it Cabeswater hiding Adam from him, or Adam hiding himself?

He barely managed a civil greeting before asking, "Is he here?"

The trees didn't answer, which was answer enough.

"Did he ask you not to tell me?"

_ Non opus erat. _

"Fucking cryptic trees," Ronan muttered sullenly. Apparently Cabeswater had no desire to get involved in a disagreement between its Greywaren and its magician. Which, to be fair, was not unreasonable.

Ronan Lynch had no interest in being fair. But if Cabeswater wasn't going to help him, hopefully it wouldn't hinder him either.

He ended up glad of Cabeswater's timeless nature, given how long it took to find Adam. In the end he'd had to look where he couldn't see, his instincts leading him through an apparently solid tree, through impossibly dense underbrush, to a huge fallen log. Beneath the log, in a tiny hollow curtained with creepers and lined with moss, Adam lay curled in a ball.

He didn't try to get away at Ronan's approach, but neither did the tense curl of him loosen. He looked as if he anticipated a blow, even here, even now. Even from Ronan.

Ronan sighed and sat beside the hollow, his back against the log. Not facing Adam, not confrontational. Whatever Adam feared, Ronan would not be it. "What happened?" he asked, carefully neutral.

The silence stretched long, even in a place without time. Ronan was no longer expecting an answer at all when the words reached him, just barely.

"He came to Saint Agnes. My father."

Worry flashed over into rage, leaving Ronan wondering if he would ever feel anything but those two emotions. "Did he hurt you?"

A small rustle as Adam shook his head. "I just…I didn't want to stay there." 

"You'd have been an idiot if you had," Ronan told him fiercely, wanting to burn away the shame and self-hate in Adam's voice. "It's not weak to get away from danger. Even if he didn't lay a finger on you, he was a threat. Getting out of there was the smart thing to do."

"I'm not smart. If I were smart, I wouldn't need all this," Adam uncurled enough to wave at his nigh-impenetrable hiding place. "He can't come here. Cabeswater would never let him in. I know that, I  _ know _ it, but…"

"But you still need to feel safe," Ronan shrugged. "Nothing stupid about that."

"I didn't, though. It didn't help."

_ I didn't _ , Ronan noted. Not  _ I don't.  _ "Now?"

Adam didn't answer in words, but he uncurled further, pulling himself halfway out of the hollow to lay beside Ronan, close enough that Ronan could feel the warmth of him.

"So if staying away from danger is smart, I guess that must make you pretty stupid, huh?"

"Shut up, asshole."

Ronan would take what he could get.

* * *

That night, Adam looked up from putting off his bedtime as a knock sounded at his door. 

"It's just me," came muffled through the thin wood.

Adam relaxed, and let Ronan in.

"Couldn't sleep? Me neither," Ronan stretched out on the floor, uninvited and unceremoniously, as if it were entirely coincidental that he was putting himself between Adam's bed and the door. 

It might have been, Adam thought - it wasn't as if the room was large enough for Ronan to be much of anywhere else. But somehow he thought it wasn't. Adam thought that maybe he should be embarrassed, or defensive, or protest that he didn't need a bodyguard, that he was fine on his own (he wasn't). 

"No. Might try again, though." 

Instead, he just felt safe.

**Author's Note:**

> 'Non opus erat' = 'there was no need'. According to Google translate, anyhow, but the nice thing about Cabeswater speaking Ronan's shitty Latin is that I don't need to worry about shitty auto translations :)


End file.
